The Company of Fools Giveaway with AnneMarie Hartnett

Early this past summer I had a hot guy chasing me. He had a good job, a nice house and a fast car. We had the same taste in music. We drank the same brand of beer. He took his coffee the same way I did. He made me laugh and made me go "Awwww" when he said something sweet. We spent three unforgettably steamy nights together.

His name was Mike MacNab and he was perfect. Unfortunately for me he was also imaginary.He appeared in the form of the hot bar owner in a short story I was writing. It began with Mike leading one of his waitresses, Kate Doucette, through the bowels of a bar he was renovating. She'd just lost her cool with one of the customers and it was pep-talk time:

“You could have just thrown a drink in his face. You didn’t have to try and stab him.”

“It was just a swizzle stick.”

“When you try to jam it in someone’s eyeball, it ceases to be just a swizzle stick.”

Of course, being an erotic short, the night was going to end better than it started for both Mike and Kate, because Kate was going to hit Mike with a proposition he couldn't refuse. I had no intentions of giving Mike any more than a night with Kate. Why should I? He gets to have great sex with the cutie from work he's been crushing on. Everybody has some fun and then we all go our separate ways, right?

Wrong.

What I didn't count on was the fact that Mike wanted to get the girl. I mean he really wanted to get the girl, and he was going to get her if it killed him or, in Mike's case, drove me clean up the wall. Every time I sat down to edit the story there he was, whispering in my ear and making suggestions and filling in blanks. I tried to ignore him but it was impossible. I argued that I don't write about people who fall in love. I write about being who have fabulous sex in 5000 words or less. The epic battle of wills between myself and Mike culminated when he threatened to come on vacation with me the following month. No matter how much I whined and complained he wouldn't relent. He was in love and he wanted everyone to know it.

Bastard.

And so I did what anyone in my position would do. I unleashed Mike on an unsuspecting Kate. A few weeks later I had The Company of Fools.

Blurb:

Kate Doucette’s trying to get her life together. She’s working full time at Mike MacNab’s bar, going to school, and she just kicked out her Do-Nothing boyfriend. Things are looking up but with the construction going on in the bar, her money trouble's looming over her, and her personal life in the toilet, Kate’s on a ledge and Mike is there to talk her down. One night she wants more than a pep talk; Kate asks her charming and handsome boss to spend a weekend in bed with her.What could be a bigger stress-reliever than two days of bedroom Olympics with a guy who’s as hot for her as she is for him? The only problem is that he wants more than a weekend and it seems like he wants to fix her life for her. She adores Mike, but the last thing she needs is another headache in the form of Mr. Fixit.

Excerpt:

“You need to eat. And sleep. And you know, blink occasionally.”

“I don't have time to do any of those things.”

“You'll make time. As a matter of fact, as soon as John and Donald come in, you're taking me out for Chinese.”

He shook his head as he slid onto a stool. “Why do I have to buy?”

“You make more money than I do, and you owe me for Monday. I could have slept in, but instead I was here interviewing for waitstaff—Oh, hello? Hello?” She held the phone in front of her and rolled her eyes. “You know, I don't mind being put on hold, but honestly, do they have to keep breaking into the music to tell me what a great deal I'd get on wireless?”

“Yes, that's tragic. Now, you were saying how I owed you?”

She sighed and tucked the phone back against her ear. “Even Dr. Frankenstein bought Igor a nice meal every once in a while.”

“All right, fine.” He threw his hands up and bobbed his head in agreement. “Chinese it is. Maybe my fortune cookie will tell me I'll get lucky.”

Kate raised her brows in mock horror. “Michael Allan MacNab, are you suggesting that you're having some difficulties in that department?”

“Let's just say blinking isn't the only thing I don't have time to do lately,” he said and pouted at her. “I almost bought a Studglove last week.”

Kate frowned. “What's a Studglove?”

“It's a—” His gaze slid sideways and he cleared his throat. “It's a sleeve that goes over your dick. You turn it on. It vibrates.”


Link:
http://www.loose-id.com/The-Company-of-Fools.aspx

Website:
http://www.annemariehartnett.com/

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Erotocomedy with Jeremy Edwards

Erotocomedy
by Jeremy Edwards

I’ve written well over a hundred short erotica pieces, and I believe that humor crops up in the majority of them. Sometimes it’s just the occasional witty observation on the part of a character or the narrator, while in other instances there’s a vein of banter or levity coursing through the entire tale.

As an erotica writer, it’s my job to make sure our chuckles don’t come at the expense of the sensuality or the orgasms; but it’s fun finding ways to use humor to complement the sexiness—developing character, breaking the ice, building sexual tension ... and keeping the reader amused while we’re en route to the bedroom. Sex and laughter are two of my very favorite things, and I love the ways they can interact.

And it’s no surprise that when I sat down to write my first erotic novel, I recognized that humor would be key to my approach. Moreover, I knew its role would go beyond that of a garnish: a novel requires a heap of plot, and my plot was going to be a comedic one—a zany erotica adventure.

In other words, I wanted to write the funniest sexy book I could—and the sexiest funny book.

Here’s the official description of Rock My Socks Off, which gives you an idea of what I came up with:

Writer Jacob Hastings is uninspired by his latest assignment: a museum full of hideous rocking horses. But his socks are rocked by Normandie Stephens, a mischievous astronomer who can match his dry wit, quip for quip, and his sexual appetite, frolic for frolic, with energy to spare.

Thanks to Jacob’s public relations and the machinations of a feisty and frisky mentor named Kate, an impasse in Normandie’s career promises to blossom into either glory or disaster—with enigmatic photographer Susan and obtuse clubber Brandon along for the wild rocking-horse ride. Between farcical talk show appearances, sensuous threesomes, horny little quickies, sex-drenched romantic getaways, and close calls with utter embarrassment, the pace never lets up in this smart erotic romp.

And here’s a brief ... um ... taste of how the book reads:

She waited until he had properly situated himself, then she squatted over his face so that her pussy was a few inches above his mouth. ‘We’re going to do lick-ups.’

‘Lick-ups?’

‘They’re sort of like sit-ups. You use your muscles to raise yourself up till your tongue can reach … me. You keep your head in its raised position for – God, as long as you possibly can, please – then you let it drop back onto the bed. Rest and repeat.’

'I see!’ said Jacob.

‘Trust me, it will be *great* … uh, exercise.’

That it was. Jacob’s abs got a workout each time he strained to reach her. And the tender, exquisite reaction to every touch of his tongue was a more than adequate reward for his efforts. And he was beautifully motivated to repeat the effort time and again. It seemed as if Normandie might even come before he reached his lick-up limit.

The sound of the door opening startled them. Jacob was sure he had taken care to leave the FOR GOD’S SAKE DO NOT FUCKING DISTURB THIS PERPETUALLY HORNY COUPLE sign on the knob.

‘Oh, sorry guys,’ said Kate. ‘Say, are you doing lick-ups?’

Jacob sat up for real as Normandie reluctantly shimmied off his face. ‘Why does everyone know about lick-ups but me?’ he asked. ‘I was just getting the hang of it, too.’

‘I can see that,’ said Kate. ‘And, if I may say so, well hung.’

****

I’m very excited this week, because Rock My Socks Off has just been released in the UK (with North American release scheduled for later in the year). I am deeply grateful to my publisher, Xcite Books, for believing in my ability to make you laugh and make you come—almost at the same time.

Please visit the Xcite website for easy ordering. (They ship worldwide.)

You’ll also find Rock My Socks Off available through numerous UK and world online retailers, and in many Waterstone’s brick-and-mortar bookshops.

And for much more Jeremy Edwards (including half-naked author portraits and my “Rock My Socks Off” song), visit http://www.jeremyedwardserotica.com/

I also blog, at http://www.jerotic.blogspot.com/

Thank you, Roxanne!

Bio:

The libidinous fiction of Jeremy Edwards has been widely published online (at Clean Sheets, Erotic Woman, Fishnet, Good Vibrations, Oysters & Chocolate, Sex-Kitten, and other sites), as well as in over thirty-five print anthologies from Cleis, Logical-Lust, New American Library, Phaze, Running Press, and Xcite. His work was selected for The Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica vols. 7, 8, and 9.

As a guest on the Web circuit, Jeremy has been seen or heard at Erotica Readers & Writers Association, Lust Bites, LoveHoney, Dr. Dick’s Sex Advice, and Cult of Gracie Radio. In the nonvirtual world, he has read his work at the In the Flesh series in New York, the Erotic Literary Salon in Philadelphia, and (via telephone) In the Flesh: L.A. He has been featured in the literary showcase of the Seattle Erotic Art Festival and is a frequent contributor to Scarlet and Forum [UK] magazines.

Photograph by Mayumi Yoshimaru

Winner Wednesday

elaing8 is the winner of Kayden McLeod's Unknown Worlds

and SiNn (how appropriate but I didn't pick her, just a random draw) wins Tera Patrick's Sinner Takes All

Congrats sinners...uhm I mean winners :-)

Review of Moregasm at Mainsteam Erotica

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