Monday, October 31, 2011

Fear and Sex- Forever Intertwined Plus a Giveaway


Fear and sex are an inexplicably intertwined couple.

For most of us at some point in our lives sex has been connected with fear and fear has been connected to sex- fear of having sex, fear of getting caught having sex, fear of getting pregnant or catching something because of sex, fear of sex for the first time or fear of the first time with someone new…

Fear can be erotic, it can be an aphrodisiac. Fear can make you feel really alive. Your heart races, your blood rushes through your veins, your temperature rises and your senses are on high alert- and all of this can make sex so much more exquisite. That little extra thrill can be a jolt that takes the ride to new heights.

Consider the dating ritual of the male taking the female to a horror movie or a haunted attraction- she’s frightened, he can put his arms around her, comfort her, then later when alone that closeness can become something much more erotic. Fear becomes an aphrodisiac; the horror creates a need for life affirming, pleasurable actions to drown out the fear and the horror.
What’s more life affirming and pleasurable than sex?

Plus the darkness can be so attractive- I think that’s why Halloween becomes more popular every year. What better way to drown out the true horrors of life than by scaring ourselves silly? Especially when afterward you can curl up in a lover’s arms and feel more alive than ever.

Another role fear plays in our sex lives, is that we are often attracted to the things we fear.

Some men are attracted to powerful women, sexually aggressive women- women that they fear, women that will dominate them.

In some cultures men are so fearful of women they do anything and everything to thwart their control and power- from surgically altering their bodies so they can not feel pleasure or be attractive or just hiding them under layers upon layers of clothing. Thankfully many women in the US don’t have to worry about such things, but the fact these practices still exist in our modern world is fearsome.

But I digress. I would rather concentrate on the more pleasurable aspects of fear.

Consider women who adore the bad boys.

Bad boys are forbidden and sometimes scary. We know they are wrong for us. Bad boys can be dominating, dangerous, big and completely fearsome- and that makes us want them even more. Some of us see bad boys as a project we can fix while others just want to ride that dangerous rollercoaster of fear and arousal.

Nothing shows how strong our attraction to bad boys is more than the popularity of paranormal romance and paranormal erotica books.

Supernatural bad boys are the ultimate combination of fear and sexual attraction.

Consider the vampire who could snap us in two or drain us of blood before we could do anything about it, yet we crave him like no other.

How about the ferocious werewolf who could rip us to shreds? But oh yes we are attracted to his animal magnetism.

How about the seductive demon who displays danger more than any other creature yet his sexuality is so forceful, so enthralling we just cannot deny him?

Fear and desire, such a delicious combination – especially for the paranormal predator and those of us drawn to them.

I love reading paranormal romances and paranormal erotica. It is both and escape and a desire driven thrill ride, a safe one at that, because in the real world would we really want to date vampire? Hmmm…that’s a discussion for another time. 

I also love to write paranormal erotic romances, the little tingles of fear thrown into the attraction are delicious little tidbits that make being a writer such an awesome job.

In my short story collection, Paranormal Pleasures Ten Tales of Supernatural Seduction, fear is an underlying theme in many of the stories.

Whether it’s fear of getting involved in a serious relationship, fear of getting caught in a compromising situation, fear of trying something or someone new, or the sweet thrill of flirting with danger- the fear is there, enticingly intertwined with the seduction.

I’m offering one lucky reader a chance to delve into my world today. I’m giving away one ecopy of Paranormal Pleasures.

To enter just leave a comment on this post telling me what you think about the combination of fear and sex.


Paranormal Pleasures Ten Tales of Supernatural Seduction can be purchased at Amazon in print or for the Kindle, at BN for the Nook, and in multiple eBook formats at Smashwords and All Romance Ebooks .

4 comments:

Kasumi said...

I think it could be an exciting combination. I don't like feel fear (I can't stand terror films) but I can understand that somebody can feel more excitation with fear.

Thanks for the international chance!

kasumigogo[at]gmail[dot]com

Debby said...

I like the blog post. Horror movies make sense.

debby236 at gmail dot com

Vanessa N. said...

I believe that as a combination of fear and sex can be exciting. It's that anticipation of the unknown that can be enticing.

mythic021@gmail.com

Niina said...

Sex and Fear is just about the most delicious compination. I personally love bad boys, especially supernatural bad boys... hence this book would be such a good fit for me. ;)

elvenspirit(at)gmail(dot)com

P.S: Loved your blog entry!