Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Top 10 items to get for the gargoyle on your christmas list: Guardian of the Abyss Guest Blog by Shannon Phoenix

Top 10 items to get for the gargoyle on your christmas list:

1.     A box of chocolates. Indeed, you may not believe it, but gargoyles really like chocolate. Now that more of them have decided to take up the habit of eating, it has become in very high demand. So please your gargoyle friend--or lover--with a box of chocolates.

2.     A plush shammy in his favorite color. What gargoyle likes to get wet in the rain? None of them. So when they go hide out in the shed to stay out of the rain, ensure that they have a shammy on hand to dry off with. You can yell at them later for shirking their guard duty due to a bit of water. This, obviously, is of no use for wachter vogels. As water spouts, they prefer to be out in the rain. But the grotesques definitely prefer to ride out the storm indoors.

3.     Jewelry. No, of course they don't wear it, they're men. But they do love to put things in their hoards, and jewelry is a big favorite.

4.     Electronics. Skip the t-shirts and neckties since they can form those, themselves. Go with electronics. Gargoyles these days are becoming more and more tech savvy. However, you might want to get the waterproof versions, or put them into a plastic baggy. Since they live on rooftops, and all that.

5.     A pet cat. Don't get your gargoyle a dog. Too many gargoyles have been used as fire hydrants. Please don't do this to your friend. And remember that pet birds are also unwanted, for an equally foul and related reason. However, a pet cat can be brought to the roof and curl up and sleep on your gargoyle friend to keep him company.

6.     Several cartons of coffee. At first glance, this seems to be a strange offering. However, keep in mind that coffee is a strong bargaining tool for the gargoyles and werewolves with the goblins. With several cartons of coffee, your gargoyle pal can purchase a lot of magical items.

7.     A book of poetry. Your gargoyle might not be able to read, but he'll enjoy the patterns the words make, anyway. Some can, some can't. But all seem to enjoy watching the pages flutter in the breeze.

8.     Games. Well, wouldn't YOU get bored squatting on top of a building all day?

9.     Flavored chapstick. I think this one should explain itself. But I'll take a stab at it, anyway. When you're squatting all day on top of a building, the wind can really get to you after a while. And chaptstick is just more fun if it's flavored.

10.  An owl statuette. Last but not least, you should give your gargoyle an owl statuette. These little guys chase the pigeons away. I'm sure I don't need to tell you what pigeons doo. If you truly care about your gargoyle friend, you'll make sure he's got something to chase away the pigeons. Remember to keep moving them around or the pigeons will catch on... eventually.

Merry Christmas to our gargoyle friends! 

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Fang-tastic Books

Guardian of the Abyss
Supernatural Singles
Shannon Phoenix

Genre: Paranormal Romance

Number of pages: 127
Word Count: 43,500

Book Description:

Buried at sea by the sorcerers who created him, Abaddon is unable to heal himself and unable to replenish his energy. He has lived here for longer than he can remember, with no hope of escape. Time is against him as the sea eats away at him, body and soul.

When her diving partner tries to kill her to take over her company, Sarah finds herself trapped beneath the waves and dying. Having brought light to Abaddon's dark existence at last, only she can grant him the courage to do what must be done to escape his watery prison.

Abaddon must sacrifice his wings to save her. Sarah must come to terms with being trapped with someone she has been raised to believe is a demon, and face the betrayal that nearly destroyed her and the company she built. Together, they must take on the ocean and their own fears. The consequence of failure is death.

About the Author:

Shannon Phoenix always wrote stories. She watched the characters take on their lives within her mind, and began to write down what they were doing. She would write the stories and then let them go. But a few years ago, she got caught writing those stories. You know... those stories.
To her surprise, the person who found her stories loved her characters as much as Shannon did. She tentatively allowed others to read the stories, as well, and it was from that first foray into the scary world of letting others read her 'little tales' that Shannon Phoenix Books was born.

Shannon lives in New Hampshire with her husband John, her daughter, and their family cat, Song. Her full time job is parenting, her part time job is as a mother's helper to a family friend, and her passion is letting the characters in her mind out on paper--or keyboard, as the case may be.

Welcome to Shannon Phoenix Books. May you find the magic in your own life.


Anonymous said...

Thanks for having me today, Roxanne!

Hopefully all gargoyle lovers (and friends) will have a much better Christmas after reading this.

Gargoyles are always pleased to get any gifts, but it's so nice to get them something that fits...

This list was created by multitudinous discussions with gargoyles. Despite the many roofs I climbed, I was not injured in the making of this list.

~ Shannon

Roxanne Rhoads said...

love this, it's hard to figure out what to get for those hard to shop for guys...and gargoyles...well you just never know. I certainly had no idea what one may like. Now I do ;-)