Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Two Naughty Versions of The Night Before Christmas

Twas the Night Before XXX Mas
By Roxanne Rhoads 

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
I was frantically clicking away with my mouse

My stockings were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that some dildos would soon be there

I wanted to be nestled all snug in my bed
But visions of hot studs danced in my head

I was in my nightie and a cute little thong
I had finally settled down to play with my dong

When under my window arose such a clatter
I jumped out of bed mad as a hatter

Over to the window my neighbors got a flash
My breasts fell out when I threw open the sash

The moon shown on my breasts like new fallen snow
Giving my skin a luster to any viewers below

When what to my unbelieving eyes should appear
but a big ass sleigh and eight horny reindeer

With a hot sexy driver so studly and thick
I knew in a moment it must be Saint Prick

Faster than vibrating dildos they came
He hooted and hollered and called them by name

Come on Dasher and Dancer, Prancer and Vixen,
Go Comet and Cupid, Faster Donder and Blitzen

Get over that fence, make it up that wall
I want to mount that bitch, I'll mount them all

I was quiet as could be watching him fly
They passed all obstacles on the way to the sky

Up to my rooftop the reindeer they flew
With a sleigh full of sex toys and Saint Prickolas too

And in a twinkling I heard them on the roof
The dancing and prancing of each heavy hoof
As I tucked away my breasts and covered my ass
Down the chimney came Saint Prickolas with a crash

He was dressed in velvet from his head to his foot
His clothes were all covered in ashes and soot

A bundle of sex toys he flung to the floor
He stripped off his clothes and hung them on my door

His muscles how they rippled, ass dimples how merry
His cheeks were all rosy, his cock red as a cherry

His sensuous mouth was curved like a bow
The hair on his head as white as the snow

The base of his cock he held tight in his hand
A condom encircled the head like a wreath

He had a thick shaft and a big fat tip and his balls
shook when he laughed, I wanted to give them a lick

His penis was chubby and plump, a well endowed young elf
I got horny when I saw him in spite of myself

With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head
He had me flat on my back upon my big bed

He spoke not a word but dove into his work
He filled my pussy with a twitch and a jerk

With just a few thrusts and fast pumps I came
Yelling and screaming and calling his name

As soon as he came he pulled right away, put a toy in my sock
then he climbed out the window naked holding his fat cock

I heard him exclaim as he climbed in his sleigh
"Merry Christmas, sexy! That was a great fucking lay!"

(c) 2007

My Naughty Night Before Christmas
By Roxanne Rhoads

It was the night before Christmas and all through the house
I was horny as hell clicking away at my mouse

I was looking at porn on the computer with care
Fantasizing about studs with long golden hair

Hot and ready I nestled all snug in my bed
but my vibrator died when I stuck in the head

I was naked as could be holding that big dong
I had been so excited I ripped off my thong

Outside my door I heard a soft pitter patter
I fell out of bed making a really loud clatter

I passed by the window, anyone looking got a flash
I was still butt naked and I hadn't closed the sash

The moon shown off my breasts like fresh fallen snow
My neighbors would surely think I was a slutty ho

I opened my door and what did I find?
A well endowed stud ready to blow my mind

He was better than batteries any day of the week
Naughty thoughts caused a blush to creep up my cheek

I was hot and horny and ready to come
When he fell to his knees and stuck out his tongue

I wriggled and giggled and moved my pelvis against him
His tongue swirled and curled then he stuck it right in

My knees started to buckle, I was going to fall
He grabbed my buttocks and leaned me on the wall

His mouth was amazing, his tongue so fine
I hoped I could keep him and make him mine

I held back no longer and came with a shriek
Then he laid me on my bed and kissed my cheek

And then in a twinkling my legs were spread
His large cock loomed over me, the tip bright red

I drew up my knees and closed one eye
As his large candy cane slid deep into my pie

His body moved above me like liquid fire
Taking me to new heights, soaring higher and higher

My nails dug in to the muscles of his back
Pumping hard I could feel the slap of his ball sack

I looked in his eyes, how they twinkled, his smile so merry
I kissed his full lips that were red as a cherry

I envisioned him wrapped with ribbons and a bow
Waiting for me in the white Christmas snow

The length of his shaft waiting for my wet sheath
A green condom circled the head like a wreath

I opened my eyes to broad shoulders and a flat belly
I shook as he thrust my body was like jelly

His cock was chubby and plump, what a sexy elf
I was going to come again, a surprise to myself

With a wink of his eye and a thrust of his head
He pushed my body harder into the soft bed

He spoke not a word but kept up with his work
then he filled my pussy with a twist and a jerk

He laid a soft kiss beside my cold nose
And quickly up off the bed he rose

He ran out the door without a goodbye
Then suddenly past the window he did fly

I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight
"Merry Christmas, darling. I'll be back tonight."